Is Your Approach Honest and What’s the difference with the Fake?

Hello mate,
Today we’ll discuss the routines many pick-up artists use. You’ve probably heard of it, you may even use some in your game.

Let’s start from the description of this in the pick-up community.

What is this thing called routine?

It’s ready material, typically some sort of line, question and similar thing that when done right, conveys certain qualities in the person that makes it, starts a conversation in a desired way, gives specific hints to a woman and etc. Things of this kind.

One typical example of routine is the old question which a person can use to approach people – “Who lies more, men or women?”, with it’s sequence (almost no matter what they say) “Oh? Because a friend of mine thinks that men lie more but for more little things and women lie …” You get the idea. The conversation goes on.

Or – the cube game which is simple pseudo psychology test which uses symbolic meanings  (i.e. subconscious mind) to “profile the girl”. You ask her to imagine certain things and then she gives you details about these things. Using the details she is giving, you magically reads her traits. It’s pretty fun and fairly inaccurate game in my opinion. I mean most of the conclusions you can give are valid for 90% of the people out there if not even more.

Or this example – assigning roles to the girls in a group “Who is  the wealthiest of you? You? We’re setting the marriage for Monday! But…we need, who is the best cook here? Ok you’ll be our master chef!”.

A lot of gurus don’t like the routines – claim them as fake. I admit, I agree with them – routines may deliver one very strange feeling that gives “fakeness” to the other person. The problem with that is guys tend to learn those almost by heart. And then they shoot them whenever they enter a conversation, like a child told to recite something it leaned the other day. It’s like the person is there, but not there. A slight change in his style might be detected and this slight change isn’t feeling natural to the other person around.

This is one thing. Another is – if it all goes well and the conversation continues what happens when the guy runs out of prepared materials? Most likely drastic change of the dynamics and his style. This leaves very awkward feeling. Showing something and then delivering another different thing.

The word routine itself is something you do repeatedly, as a habit.

Washing your teeth every morning is routine. Putting your belt every time you get in the car is routine. That is ok. That is helpful. Saying same stuff when speaking to different people limits your mind. So do this cautiously.

Routines however have one very good purpose – they can override some inner issues the person is having at that moment. They can start conversation while otherwise it might be difficult for that person. They can keep the attention of someone that otherwise might be difficult for that person and so on. Actually the first I started I used ready materials myself. Using such can have benefits. And in some cases it can “save” a conversation that might be going nowhere.

My advice on this is – if you’re going to use ready routines and lines – pick such that you feel natural to you and your style. Don’t go with something you might never say or do (unless you want to stress yourself on purpose). Then try it in front of  the mirror several times. Is it ok for you? Does your style changes much, like a sales person trying to sell you something? If it feels natural – then you can apply it.

And please don’t get hooked up on it. I had a time where I used routines to my friends. I mean I was so caught in this thing. This wasn’t good, especially in my case it wasn’t my style at all.

Actually the best  thing is that if you’re going to use them at all – check out some, and then make some of your own. They will fit you, they’ll be part of you and they will feel natural to you. Believe me, the difference is noticeable.

If you’ve read this far – I got one very, very good honest approach for you. Next time you feel awkward, run out of conversation, or feel something isn’t right – just share it with the other person (don’t get overboard mushy-mushy emo style, not attractive). For example you go to talk to a girl but suddenly as you approach your mind goes  blank and you say: “Hey, I just came to talk to you but… I forgot what was I about to say.” and you smile and then introduce yourself. Like it’s the most natural thing that can happen (and it is since every person feels this way once in a while).

The other person typically will react positively. There might be occasions where she can try to stomp you “Oh, peace off!” and you feel a little disappointed, then say it “Oh, you looked a lot more friendly initially”.
This honest approach gives the following vibes of you:

  1. you are a person that is pretty comfortable with his feelings. A mature person that knows himself well. You have no problem opening yourself to total strangers;
  2. you are honest person and honesty is very attractive quality for other mature people. Yes, little pain in the butt girls will find you “weak”. But that’s not the point.

As a “side benefit” you’ll learn also to be comfortable with your emotions (again, not some mushy-washy wussy way). This is tough at the start, especially if you’re more introverted person (like me). But once you manage to get a hold of it – a lot of conversations will feel a lot more light and fluent to you. They’ll feel natural.

You won’t need the ready materials that much (or at all)

This inner strength you’ll begin developing will help your progress a lot more. Getting to much used to routines will get you stuck with the progress.

For me – expressing emotions became so much easier this way. A lot less holding of things that I otherwise suppressed in myself. For example I can say no without the fear of offending someone. Before I was too much concerned about offending someone or what he’ll think about me. In short – life became a lot more enjoyable and light.

And for finish let me quote for you David DeAngelo:
If you want a fake woman, them be a fake man. (Edit: David D knows that well, from experience perhaps)

This will be topic to another article. Think about it – a lot of wisdom in that one.

Secrets of Natural Attraction – How to Attract Women

John Alanis used to be a self proclaimed loser who had zero luck at getting women to be interested in him.

Every time he saw a woman who was even the slightest bit attractive, he would clam up and be too afraid to approach her. This all changed after he realized how to get women to approach him and then had all the right things to say.

He has compiled his knowledge into the Secrets of Natural Attraction guide in hopes of helping men who are in the same position now as he used to be.

This dating advice book is all you need to score the woman of your choice.

The guide discusses the common mistakes to avoid when trying to get women to notice you. Many men perform these because they have not been taught any better.

If you know what does not work, you will be able to prevent yourself from being considered one of the “nice guys” that no female wants to date. It may seem weird that a dating advice book would cover what NOT to do, but it is helpful information if you want to be sure you are doing the right thing.

Securing a first date is also a point talked about in the Secrets of Natural Attraction book.

If you want to know who to get women approaching you for a date, you will need to read this section.

There are appropriate steps every man should take once a woman has begun a conversation with you. You first want to be able to decide whether the lady in question is your type. Considering what you want in a relationship beforehand is vital to determine if this woman is worth pursuing. If she is, you will want to make sure you go about setting up the first meeting with her in the right way.

Once the two of you have set a date, this dating advice book covers how to act at this meeting.

The author stresses that you do not want to contact your date prior to the meeting. This could give her a way out, and you want to avoid that if you are really interested.

There are certain things that you can say on the first date that can help you decide if you will want a second date with the woman in question. You want to make conversation and find out more about her, and this guide will teach you exactly how to do that. Asking questions should be done in a proper manner so that you get enough information about her without being too nosy.

Body language is another important aspect that the Secrets of Natural Attraction guide covers. You want to have the proper body language if you plan to attract women without saying a word. It is very flattering to have females that you find attractive approaching you. This gives you the upper hand.You will then have the ability to rule out those that you do not find attractive in return so that you can snag a woman that you are interested in.

Having options is a good thing, especially when it comes to dating, and this dating advice book will present you with ways of obtaining lots of choices.

Is College Dating Good And How To Learn From It?

Dating in college is one of those topics that involves people a lot and at the same time very little of them actually think about this. It’s not them to blame – no one actually gave any hints to the guys in that place.
College can be very good source of experience in dating. A lot of people begin serious dating during that time of their lives. And such experience can really give you direction on what type of women (or guys, considering you’re a woman) and what type of relationship suits you best.

Not only that

It can also give you foundation of core skills (flirting, responsibility, feeling calm around hot people that you dig and so on) in that field, no matter the goal you seek. And if you have your awareness turned on – you’ll certainly learn.

I did the mistake to be totally asocial during my college years, isolating myself from lot of people and of course, reducing my dating to zero. So, if you read this and are heading on similar path, please do something to cut it (like downloading the started advice from my page)! Otherwise it won’t help in the future.

Here is interesting article on the College dating topic

It is very general and can give you hints on fields that you didn’t think about at this point. On some points I have another opinion, but before that go and read it.
Finished? No really, there are very good points of view inside.

Here is my opinion on two points, a little different on that matter:
I don’t advise you to get married in college. Although you might think this is the perfect girl/boy for you, later in life you will certainly meet someone with who it will be just “instant click”. You both will be mature and have experience which you didn’t have at the college point.

For me College isn’t definitely the best years of my life, for the reasons you read above. However I am certain that even you have awesome time during that time, you can continue having similar experiences by power your whole life! Do not limit yourself to college.

So if you are in college – use this time best of your abilities. If you already graduated and didn’t (like me), it is never late to improve yourself in this field!

Scarcity mindset vs abundance mindset

The potatoes price example
“The poor get poorer and the rich get richer.”
When I was little I believed in the existing of some sort of supernatural balance. I was convinced that for example a person can’t be both smart and good looking. That you can’t have all. People around me actually supported that concept. Another example – if someone have money, then he was doing something illegal. Very limiting mindset.

A lot of years later things seemed different. Again I saw balance, it just wasn’t supernatural. Again I saw you can’t have all, you just could have what you wanted. People just love to create excuses to make themselves feel justified. Don’t blame anyone, it’s just how the mind works.

Before getting really out of  topic –  Carlos Xuma by his newsletter reminded me one very good concept – the abundance and scarcity mindsets.

Basically it works like this – if you have PLENTY of something, that thing will have less value for you rather than if you had FEW or NONE of it. We’re talking of something of prime need. Let’s take food for example.

If you have plenty of food, a lot more that you can eat, you will put the rest of it aside because you won’t need food right now. If you had no food, you would starve thus you would looking to get more food.

Another story from economics (I remember this as real life example). Imagine a village which primary food source is from buying potatoes. Now imagine if they see in the news that the prices of potatoes will go up. They’ll stock the hell out of potatoes before the price rises.

So we can conclude, the less a person is having but needing the more desperate he will become to have.

The same is with women. The more you don’t have, the more you are in need. The more you have and the more you could have (i.e. able to attract) the less you are in need. And to bring that to a new level – the more you are in need – the more desperate you are. This hits your inner game. Your inner game hits your everything in the related topic which in this case is attracting women. If you are calm everything works like a charm – from martial arts to cooking, writing blog posts, to creating attraction with women.

When you are not wasting focus on something

that was an issue before, you now have more emotional energy available to focus elsewhere and pursuit your goals. This makes you even more happy and even more attractive to others.

Yet abundance mindset is only truly in effect when you have facts that confirm it or in our case – positive results. Even if you force the mindset that you live in abundance when you don’t, it will only go so far since there will be nothing to support it. So the basic concept here is – practice and again practice. And knowing how this concept and your mind works will help you.

Also another way to ‘close the gap’ is to really think of why do you need women? Because I’ve found out that many guys want women just to have, no deeper particular reason. When you ask the questions and are aware why you need them, this need will reduce in size.

The Do’s and Dont’s Of Online Dating

Online dating is catching on as a phenomenon more and more. Lots of people are taking advantage of the convenient opportunity to meet potential partners online. It seems to be an easy process and has been yielding great results. Sites like eHarmony.com claim to be matching people successfully; so much so that quite a big number of their users end up happily married to their soul mate. With the success of online dating, more and more people are beginning to sign up.

Online dating is not going anywhere:

it’s here to stay. And it’s not just for the ugly girl, older men, or the geek: it’s for everyone. That means that if you aren’t dating online, then it’s time for you to start. But there are a few things that you need to know. First and foremost you need to understand how to best sell yourself online. It’s not that you want to lie about who you are but you do want to portray yourself so as to attract the kind of person that you will be most compatible with.

Here are some tips that will help you find the right man or woman for you through online dating.

Tip 1 – Use a good photo.

You should use a good photo of yourself as your profile picture on any dating website. The picture should be a recent picture of you and reflect what you look like right now. If necessary, take a picture of yourself today. Make sure that you look good, but again, don’t misrepresent yourself. You want someone who is going to want you for the way that you look now; you don’t want anyone who doesn’t want you for who you are. Additionally, they are going to see you anyway so there’s no point in hiding the truth.

Tip 2 – Never lie on your profile.

When starting the adventure that is online dating, your first step is often to write a bio or profile about yourself, so potential dates will have an idea of what kind of person you are, your interests, personality, and so forth. You don’t have to reveal everything, of course, but make sure that the information you give is honest. Don’t make things up in an attempt to seem more interesting or mysterious, because if you do meet someone, your lies will catch up to you and your date might think you can’t be trusted.

Tip 3 – Never ignore your emails and messages.

Nothing cools a would-be date’s ardor like getting a distinctive sense of indifference from the target of their affection. If you’re genuinely interested in meeting someone online, put yourself out there and be willing to communicate with people. Respond to emails and messages promptly; at the very least, it’s the polite thing to do.

Tip 4 – Move slowly.

Once you have secured a date with someone, be sure to take things slowly. Never meet someone at your home for a first date. Be sure not to give out too much personal information on a date and try your best to get to know someone on a friendly level first.

If you can avoid these common mistakes, then in no time at all you’ll probably find yourself dating someone who could be the right one for you. Remember every relationship needs to undergo a lot of trials and obstacles before it can survive the real world, but if it’s the right person, it’ll all be worthwhile.

Dorthy Weatherbush has recommended eHarmony.com to a number of her single friends and family members. Thanks to eHarmony.com, Dorthy’s sister is now happily engaged to who she believes is the love of her life.

Simple Acts to Make Your Girl Feel Special!

Seeing your girlfriend smile is one of the most beautiful things you could see in this world. It makes you fall in love with her over and over again, and moments later, you also catch yourself smiling. Making her smile doesn’t require you to buy 50 karat diamond rings or expensive trips to the Maldives. Just simple acts expressing your love for her would be enough to make her feel special.

Surprise Her with Little Gifts!

Giving her something special doesn’t require you to rack your brains out trying to think of something romantic. As it goes, it’s the thought that counts! For example, you’re at the grocery store picking up your weekly supply of beer and came across a book she was meaning to buy, it wouldn’t hurt to buy it for her. She would surely appreciate your thought about remembering something she wanted.

Or if you were to pass by some flowers on an ordinary day, it would surely make her day better knowing that there is still a romantic guy in you, WOW Date recently done a survey and found out that 93% of women in the UK, prefer surprises, so guys remember that.

Help Her!

We don’t mean an extravagant act like paint her house or pay off her mortgage. Like we’ve said, it’s best to keep it simple. Take the dog for a walk, vacuum the house, wash the dishes or organize her CD collection- all of it won’t take you more than 15 minutes. Coming home from work and knowing that the dog was walked or the dishes were done would give her a sigh of relief. You’ll also show that you’re not just some stuck up couch potato. Those extra moments she just freed up can now be spent on hanging out with you. Or even on making sweet love.

Let Her Help You! Girls love to help too!

And she would appreciate it if you would let her help you. Again, we’re not talking about exhausting activities she can partake it. Whether you’re washing your car or watering the garden, girls love to help you out simply because they want to spend more time with you. At times, they will also do something nice for you. Don’t stop her because she wants to do it. And if you’re feeling lucky, you can drop hints like how much you want to sort out your socks but haven’t got time to do it.

Appreciate Her Help!

A simple “Thank you” or “I appreciate it” goes a long way, even in relationships. Guys take for granted the things girls do, often times forgetting to acknowledge it.

Always keep in mind that your partner exerts efforts in doing things that she expects you to love. Even if she did something that was underachieved or wasn’t really necessary, she wanted to help, and the best thing you could do is thank her. Imagine yourself doing something for her and all you got was a complaint rather than thanks. That road definitely leads to a fight.

Be Proud of Her!

Flaunt her off! Show her off to your friends and make them jealous about the gorgeous woman together with a beautiful relationship you have. Don’t treat her as a trophy wife, though. Instead, tell people how amazing she is and make sure that she hears it. It definitely boosts her confidence and would make her happy knowing that YOU are happy with her.

Insider Internet Dating short review

Today we’re going to check out the Insider Internet Dating from Dave M. It’s about getting you successful in the online dating sites.

The program itself is a online site with audio and video courses. Once you get access you are able to watch, listen and download the files as you prefer.

The information in the course is presented in short parts (audio or video) which provides easy navigation. Jump in the section or module and you’ll quickly find the desired info.

When you log in, you’ll immediately see the welcome message and the menu. From here you can go to your desired spot. My recommendation is to scroll down and check out the JUMPSTAR2T. After that you can go into each individual module for more detailed information.

The program also comes with a bunch of bonuses by other gurus which you’ll be able to download as soon as you get access. My honest opinion is that some of them are quite good while others are a bit of waste. You can find few golden nuggets there.

You’ll also receive 12 reports on various situations related to the Insider Internet Dating. They are based on weekly basis.

On the top of that, again, each week you’ll receive “surprise” bonus that focuses on a specific situation you may encounter during your experience in the online dating world. Such situations are common things and it can get you stuck if you’re not prepared.

My overall experience with the course is positive. It might not be the panacea that will dominate every dating site out there as Dave claims, yet it’s really effective. Dave made the whole thing with scientific approach. The only part I don’t like is faking “in demand”. You can alter that without making phoney moves. Overall it gives you very solid learning experience with swift guidance. My online dating skills (messages and profile making) improved significantly after applying the steps. It’s like learning a new skill from a coach rather than doing it on your own.

Interested?

Come here to check the Insider Internet Dating. You’ll watch a video of Dave presenting the program. If you want to skip the video, simply close the window and then select “stay” in the pop-up.
Note! Dave will offer you some additional products as an “up-sale” when you purchase the course. Keep that in mind.
Disclaimer: This is an affiliate link. Meaning that if you like the product and buy it, it’s most likely that I’ll get a commission. Cards are down.